Diamondbacks Bats Sizzle, Starters Fizzle: A 2025 Rollercoaster in the Desert
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Posted on 2025-04-12 19:12:33 | Category: MLB,Diamondbacks
The Arizona Diamondbacks have cracked open the 2025 season with a perfect cocktail of hope and heartburn. Sitting at 7-7, they’re the definition of mid—but not without promise. If you’re looking for a team that can mash at the plate but might throw batting practice from the mound, congratulations: you’ve found your squad.
Batting: The Bats Are Blazing
Let’s start with the good news. The D-backs can hit. Corbin Carroll is on a mission from the baseball gods, slashing .315/.413/.704 with five bombs. If this guy doesn’t find himself in the NL MVP conversation, we riot. Geraldo Perdomo and Josh Naylor are quietly doing the Lord's work, and Pavin Smith somehow showed up to camp looking like the second coming of Barry Bonds.
Yes, Eugenio Suárez is whiffing like he’s auditioning for a wind farm, but he’s also launched five into orbit, so we’ll call it chaotic good. Even Ketel Marte, in limited action, is hitting like a man trying to erase all memory of last year. This offense is scary when it’s firing—which, thankfully, has been often.
Batting Grade: A-(With a bonus point for chaos energy from Suárez)
Starting Pitching: Not Great, Bob
Now, the not-so-good news. The starting rotation is, let’s say, "adventurous." Brandon Pfaadt is holding it together with duct tape and competence (3.50 ERA), but the rest? Woof. Zac Gallen’s 5.28 ERA looks like a typo, and Corbin Burnes is pitching like he thinks strike zones are optional. Merrill Kelly? Bless his heart. He’s sitting at a 7.80 ERA and making fans nostalgic for innings eaters with a pulse.
Let’s not forget Eduardo Rodríguez, who’s getting paid like an ace and delivering like a long reliever. This staff desperately needs someone—anyone—to step up and stop the bleeding.
Starting Pitching Grade: C-(And that’s generous, mostly because of Pfaadt and the belief Gallen will bounce back)
Bullpen: Unexpectedly... Good?
In a shocking twist, the bullpen isn’t the problem. Jalen Beeks has been lights out. Justin Martínez looks like a future closer, and Shelby Miller has a 0.00 ERA which frankly feels illegal at this point in his career. A.J. Puk, however, has been flirting with disaster (two HRs in five innings), but the strikeout stuff is real.
This pen has bailed out the rotation more than once, and if they keep this up, they’re going to start asking for hazard pay.
Bullpen Grade: B+(Docked slightly for the nightly drama with Puk)
Final Thoughts: The Math Ain’t Mathing Yet
The Diamondbacks are sitting at .500, but that’s not where this roster wants to be. The bats are legit, and the bullpen is surprisingly solid. But unless this rotation gets it together, they’re going to be stuck in the middle of the pack.
Still, there’s hope. If Gallen and Burnes return to form, and Kelly remembers how to throw quality starts, this team could be dangerous. Until then, it’s a rollercoaster. Buckle up.
Overall Team Grade: B (with potential)(Fix the rotation and this team could be a Wild Card nightmare.)